One Less Icon At I-Con
Words: © 2002 by Tom Smith, after Tim
Rice
Music: "One More Angel In Heaven" by Andrew Lloyd Webber
This excerpt from the newly-discovered Rice-Webber production of Tom Smith and the Annoying McNamara Dreamflight is the Big Excuse Number, telling how Our Hero's flight from Detroit Metro Airport's glorious, expensive, and badly run Ed McNamara Terminal to LaGuardia Airport in New York was cancelled for no apparent reason, thus preventing him from visiting I-Con 21 at SUNY - Stony Brook. It was premiered at that con, however, with Our Hero literally phoning in the performance.
Fandom, we've something to tell you,
A story of a crime,
A tragic but inspiring tale of airline schedule time.
Northwest has got a hundred gates
At DTW,
But for some reason still unclear,
One flight did not go through.
There's one less icon at I-Con,
There's one less filksinging guy,
Tom Smith, they somehow forgot you,
It's tough, but we're gonna get by.
There's one less concert to rush to,
There's one less CD to buy,
But, Tom Smith, the things you stand for,
Like endless flirting, never die.
When I think of his last great battle,
So skillful and adroit,
It takes a man who has no brains
To fly out of Detroit.
He should've left at three-fifteen,
But they pushed it till it fell,
Said "your flight's at six thirty-five -- A.M. --
If you're not here, oh well."
There's one less icon at I-Con,
There's one less comedy guy,
Tom Smith, they screwed up your schedule,
This sucks, but we're gonna get by.
There's one less loon at LaGuardia,
There's one less ham, very wry,
But, Tom Smith, the things you stand for,
Like rotten puns, never die.
(to the chorus of "Poor, Poor Joseph")
Poor, poor Tom Smith, what ya gonna do?
I-Con's calling you, hey, what ya gonna do?
Poor, poor Tom Smith, messed up by Northwest,
Get yourself some rest, hey, messed up by Northwest.
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