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Pine Gia-Varnish

Words and Music: © 2004 by Tom Smith
Part of the 24-Hour Project. Keywords: turpentine, antidepressant; style: Mozart opera.

Ahuh-ahuh-ahuh!

What ails you, friend?

I... am so depressed!
I'm not my best, I feel no zest,
This empty ache inside my breast,
I take no rest, I hear no jest,
I'm quite distressed, I do attest!

Sorry to hear it!

What do you suggest?

I have a plan!
If you've the notion, there's a potion
That's derived from northern wood,
It's a lotion with devotion
from the locals 'cause it's good!
The emotion that's encroachin'
on the wellness of yourself
We'll be broachin' to the ocean
With the stuff that's on the shelf!

Of course! Why didn't I think of it?
No remorse! I'll happily drink from it!
No need to pine, well, yes, there's pine,
But not that pine, as we define,
The choice is mine, it's by design,
I will not whine, wait, I've gone blind,
Now I decline, end of the line,
Set columbine around my shrine,
I'll intertwine with the divine,
I've cut the twine of my lifeline
With turpentine!

(collapses in death)

I meant moonshine!

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